This is again from my first year of uni and reading it back, I can't believe I actually wrote it. Maybe I can write after all. so with out further ado here is a monologue completely unaltered from ov 7 years ago.
Monologue
She finally called like she said she would. Should I be worried, its only eighteen months too late. Though something seemed off with her, something has changed. I remember her being so open, so talkative, but not like this. When I asked for the reason of her call she clammed up. It must be serious. Maybe she’s pregnant? No! She would’ve told me right away. Maybe she wants to get back together? If she does I’ll have to tell her about Judy…. Or maybe I won’t. Two women on the go at the same time! I reckon I could pull that off. Well here goes Sam, the moment of truth.
There she is, still the same girl I slept with those many months ago. The same looks, the same flowing beauty. Though that expressionless face, that’s different, it gives me the shivers. Something must be wrong. I can sense some kind of tension in her actions, just like there is in mine. A kind edginess to our actions, as if we are both wishing this encounter will end soon. She’s pregnant, did I just hear her correctly, all I can do is laugh, she was always good at the occasional joke. No! Wait! I did hear correctly. She wants me to help her with the baby too. I can feel the heat on my face. How do I respond, “Yes! I’ll do anything.” Did I really mean that, I hope I’ve done the right thing. Do I tell her about Judy. I see her smiling there and my conscious clears briefly.
What the hell am I going to tell Judy? “Hi honey guess what? Today I found out I had a nine month old son, wanna keep him?” No, but she has to know. I couldn’t keep something this huge from her. The there’s Sue, I know I told her I would help, but can I really do this? Am I ready to be a father? Yes, I can take on the responsibility of having a kid but I am going to need help. That’s my concern; if I tell Judy will I still have that help. “Jesus Christ, keep your eyes on the road, you prick.” Every Saturday these crappy drivers just seem to home in on me, just to give me grief.
I’ve had a son for a month now and in a couple of days his mum’s will meet for the same time. I was shocked at Judy’s reaction when I told her, but then again she had never told me she was unable to ever have kids. She sits there playing with him as if he was her own. I hope Sue can find her own ‘Judy’, it must be hard for her, especially when Tom is here, she must feel lonely. Looking back on that day, the one day that has changed my life forever. Given me a new perspective on life. Looking back with hindsight, I wouldn’t change anything. I never realised that one phone call from a one night stand and the sight of a little baby that I created could turn out to be the best thing that has ever happened to me.
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